Even in the midst of this unprecedented time, the holiday season is once again upon us.
If you’re fortunate enough to have one or more loved ones around you, you’re probably giving and receiving a gift or two. I’d like to share a few thoughts I have on gifting.
As a little girl, I found it unsettling if gifts were handed out too quickly. After a year of waiting, I wanted to see every single one-on-one gift exchange. I loved watching the eye contact, the smiles and the mutual appreciation.
The final moment of each gift exchange was my favorite. The moment of embrace between the giver and receiver, when hearts would open and feelings would flow.
If gifts are handed out too quickly, those connecting moments can get lost in paper flying and overlapping conversations.
Should you find things moving too fast in your gift exchange this year, be the one to slow things down. Savor the ritual of giving and receiving.
When we hand a gift to a loved one, we can give them our full attention. We’re feeling the gratitude of having them in our lives. We’re taking pleasure in their delight, and experiencing the joy of giving.
When we receive a gift from a loved one, we can appreciate the thought behind the gift and savor the moment of feeling chosen and appreciated. We’re never too old to connect to the child inside who still delights in mystery and surprises.
This year, bring your full attention to the acts of giving and receiving, whether it’s a box wrapped in a bow, or the gift of a long distance phone call. Do it with full awareness.
Squeeze every last drop of gratitude out of the experience, and let your weary heart open wide.
If there’s anything the last 21 months have imprinted on our brains, it’s that time is precious, life is fragile, and love is the greatest gift we have to give and receive.
Helping couples find their path to love and intimacy is one of my greatest joys. If you want to know how relationship coaching can help you along your path, set up a Discovery Call with me and let’s talk.
If sex is not on your mind these days, don’t beat yourself up about it. Our bodies are not designed to think about sex when our brains are communicating that we may be in danger. We can’t convince our bodies that we’re safe, when in fact we’re not. When stress is dictating our lack of sexual desire, we need to find ways to regulate our stress. We may not be able to avoid stress, but we can learn to manage it.
Sensual, Tantra, Romance, Passion, Fetish and Kink are all spectrums within the wide world of human sexual expression. Where we find ourselves on that spectrum is part of our journey. Personally, it’s my belief that we narrow our sexual identity far too quickly in life, and exclude other avenues to arousal before we’ve even investigated them fully.
Ask most couples about the early stages of their relationship, and they’ll remember the ease they experienced around sex and intimacy. They’ll stare off into space with memories of testosterone-driven lust and estrogen flooding seduction.