Even in the midst of this unprecedented time, the holiday season is once again upon us.
If you’re fortunate enough to have one or more loved ones around you, you’re probably giving and receiving a gift or two. I’d like to share a few thoughts I have on gifting.
As a little girl, I found it unsettling if gifts were handed out too quickly. After a year of waiting, I wanted to see every single one-on-one gift exchange. I loved watching the eye contact, the smiles and the mutual appreciation.
The final moment of each gift exchange was my favorite. The moment of embrace between the giver and receiver, when hearts would open and feelings would flow.
If gifts are handed out too quickly, those connecting moments can get lost in paper flying and overlapping conversations.
Should you find things moving too fast in your gift exchange this year, be the one to slow things down. Savor the ritual of giving and receiving.
When we hand a gift to a loved one, we can give them our full attention. We’re feeling the gratitude of having them in our lives. We’re taking pleasure in their delight, and experiencing the joy of giving.
When we receive a gift from a loved one, we can appreciate the thought behind the gift and savor the moment of feeling chosen and appreciated. We’re never too old to connect to the child inside who still delights in mystery and surprises.
This year, bring your full attention to the acts of giving and receiving, whether it’s a box wrapped in a bow, or the gift of a long distance phone call. Do it with full awareness.
Squeeze every last drop of gratitude out of the experience, and let your weary heart open wide.
If there’s anything the last 21 months have imprinted on our brains, it’s that time is precious, life is fragile, and love is the greatest gift we have to give and receive.
Helping couples find their path to love and intimacy is one of my greatest joys. If you want to know how relationship coaching can help you along your path, set up a Discovery Call with me and let’s talk.
I love my couples. They reach out for sex coaching, wanting to create a fulfilling sexual and intimate life. The number one obstacle to achieving their goals is sometimes an unhealthy relationship dynamic. For most of us, opening ourselves to sexuality with our partners requires trust, connection and a sense of emotional safety. If our relationships are being impacted by unhealthy dynamics that leave us triggered and harboring conscious or unconscious resentment, sexuality will be impacted or, at worst no longer exist.
Sexual Trauma and PTSD keep painful memories from our past alive and present in our day to day lives. Hypnotherapy uses the power of your own mind to unlock the hold these memories have on you, by helping your brain process them in a gentle and effective way. If you suffer from trauma, you’re well aware that some memories trigger feelings of present-time fear, keeping you anxious, and on high alert, even though consciously you know you’re no longer in danger. If some of those memories have created Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that means your brain is ‘matching’ those past memories to present day experiences, or what is referred to as ‘pattern matching’ in Hypnotherapy.
When two people get together to form a relationship, there are two sets of wounds merging and intertwining, our partner’s and our own. We know when our old wounds are being dragged into a conflict because our pain and defensiveness will suddenly spike. If our partner is speaking the same words as our inner abuser, the armor will go up, and disagreements will escalate into shouting, tearful battles.
When I hear a woman make such a resounding statement as ‘I’m done with sex’, I imagine a long road of frustration, obligation, unmet desires and unspoken words, leading up to that absolute declaration. Sex is not about obligation, although women have been told it was their obligation for eons of time. Relatively speaking, it wasn’t all that long ago that women were considered the property of a man, and their role in life was having a family and pleasing her husband. (and in many parts of the world still are).